Day 55: Fu Manchu

Course: Cleveland, OH to Niles, OH
Distance: 55 miles
Terrain: Some hills
Conditions: Upper lip growth

When we first went outside to pack our Thule bags into the truck it was pouring rain. Luckily it cleared up and got sunny before our takeoff. I rode with Derek and Jason. Before we left, Jason supplied our pace line with fake mustaches. Our plan was to ride with them all day, but it got really difficult about 6 miles into the ride. Jason's literally flew off of his face, mine got so annoying that I decided to throw it on the ground, and Derek's was so filled with snot and sweat that it was hanging by a thread at the first crew stop that we came to. Maybe someone who has always wanted a mustache will stumble across one of them.

We got to lodging and had a ton of fried chicken waiting for us. Nothing like fried chicken after a long bike ride! I mean that, too. Right after lunch we showered, changed, and then went into the gym of the school we were at for a dance. Everyone went berserk not knowing whether or not this was our last dance together. Our DJ was a man that had a developmental disability and had been given a grant by Push America to buy his own equipment. He played a four-song tribute to America. The guys dug it so we all circled up, held hands, and belted out some good ol' American anthems.

For dinner we went to Olive Garden. The puppeteers sat together with every intention of breaking another bread record. However, this waitress wasn't nearly as cool as Melissa. As soon as she brought out our third basket in 5 minutes she caught wind of our plan and disappeared for the rest of the meal. Someone else had to take our orders. Afterwards we went to the mall to shop for the gag gift exchange. My idea is terribly clever - I just can't release it yet.

Day 54: That's a Lot of Cheddar

Course: Day off!

We woke up and headed out to the Cleveland Children's Hospital for breakfast and a friendship visit. We split up into small groups and then were given a tour of the facility. They showed us their pool, gym, therapy rooms, and dialysis rooms. We didn't get to interact much with the kids, but I did get to talk to José when we went to dialysis. He's a 15-year-old whose kidneys don't work. He has to go to dialysis so that the machines can do the work of his kidneys for 3 hours, 5 days per week. I struck up a conversation with him and was able to find out a lot about him in just that 10 minutes that we were together. He loves English class and loves writing. He's not much of a video game kid; I thought that was impressive. José keeps a journal every day and wants to write a book one day about his battle with cancer. He already has a title for the book picked out and everything. The guy was really an inspiration.

After the tour we were asked to give an encore Kids on the Block performance. We had thought that the show was done for the rest of JOH, so we were pumped to be able to give one more. Again, we went all out with it and made the audience laugh a lot. Unfortunately, that performance was truly our last one. I had a blast doing the puppet shows, and as I said before, it will be one of my fondest memories of the trip.

For dinner we went to a place called The Melt. They specialize in grilled cheese sandwiches of all sorts. I got a deep fried grilled cheese with shrimp and aioli. It. Was. Amazing. I enjoyed my meal, but a couple of the crew guys (Jesus and Josh) decided to make their nights miserable by taking on the Melt Challenge. They're our biggest guys, but our server said he's seen 80+ people attempt it and 3 people finish it. It involves eating 3 1/2 pounds of every cheese that the place has, and then eating a combined 1.5 pounds of fries and coleslaw. Seriously, guys? They plan on doing a ride along tomorrow too...yikes.

Josh quit about halfway through. Jesus, the underdog in the competition, made it til there was about half of the pile of coleslaw and not too many fries left. He then proceeded to get up (forfeiting the challenge by doing so) and go hurl in the bathroom.

My chapter brother that loaned my brother and I the same bike to ride for the trip, Rudy Granaghan, was one of the sponsors for the meal. It was great to see him and catch up.

Day 53: Cleveland's Most Wanted

Course: Sandusky, OH to Cleveland, OH
Distance: 70 miles
Terrain: Mostly flat
Conditions: Poor roads

Our PM flat out told us in the morning that we'd be getting racked at some point. Well, that doesn't exactly motivate us to want to work hard. They told us to just sprint as hard as we can to see how far we can make it. My solution? Become a sweep and get away with not having to work hard. My pace line was in total agreement. Kevin, Beau, and I set out at a leisurely pace for the day. We rode about 28 miles before we got racked. The first pace line only made it 35 anyways.

We were racked in order to make it to lodging and shower in time to make it to the Cleveland Indians baseball game. Not a bad reason to get racked if you ask me. We made it to the game on time and everyone had a lot of fun. At one point we all got on the big screen. By everyone, I mean everyone plus my shins. I was just one row off screen and by the time I figured out that the camera was even on us it was too late.

After a nap the team headed out to a park for a sponsored dinner. We had pasta and meatballs, played volleyball, cornhole, and decided to be "those guys" that go to the playground and hog all of the equipment while kids are around.

Once we got back to lodging, the guys over 21 went out and the minors were left alone - again. I don't mean to say that with a negative connotation though. We always have more fun. Our crew chief (the guy in charge of feeding us) said we had so much food that he actually needed our help depleting it. We all delved into it and made challenges out of what was in there. Guys were taking mouthfuls of gatorade powder and scarfing down gross concoctions of food. However, we weren't satisfied. The Fizzy Monkey challenge still had to be completed. It entails eating two bananas and then drinking a liter of Sprite. It's supposed to fill your stomach and react or something to make you puke. For some reason, we were all down with puking. We walked to the store and picked up the necessary supplies, and then went back to the parking lot of our lodging to participate.

The five of us brave enough to take on the challenge had at it. Everyone got their bananas down no problem. We began to chug our sodas and all of a sudden four cop cars rolled into the parking lot - lights blaring and all - and boxed us in. They did the "Well whadda we got goin on here?" tough guy walk and strolled up to us. One asked us what we were doing and we explained who we were, what we were eating/drinking, and that this is how we pathetically occupy ourselves when we aren't 21. They admired our cause and thought the Fizzy Monkey challenge was hilarious, so they stuck around for a bit to watch the pain continue. They joked around with us for a bit and then left. The challenge continued. Jason, our resident challenge expert, finished first. He did some pushups, ran a couple of lengths of the parking lot, and then did some jumping jacks. The rest of us just stared at him blankly, clearly thinking, "We hate you." We were in so much pain.

I finished second and went straight to the bathroom. Somehow, I didn't end up hurling. The three other guys did, though. Jason and I completed the challenge, and then all I wanted to do was go to bed. Thus, I did exactly that.

Day 52: Steak With a Side of G-Force

Course: Toledo, OH to Sandusky, OH

Distance: 70 miles

Terrain: Mostly flat

Conditions: Slight headwind

Today was the second huge day that we've been looking forward to since the beginning of the trip. We headed over to the Pi Kapp house in the morning to get breakfast. Afterwards, Austin, Brooks and I headed out together to get to Sandusky ASAP. Today, we would be indulging in a little roller coaster action at Cedar Point. After the massages I was feeling refreshed. I pulled at about 23 mph for at least 10 miles on two separate occasions. As a pace line, we booked it and got to Battery Park in Sandusky third.

Once everyone arrived we staged up and headed over to our friendship visit with Ability Works. I got to eat lunch with a guy named Jeff. He had a developmental disability and was in a wheelchair, but he loved to laugh. We talked about everything from motorcycles to forest fires. He couldn't wait to get on the dance floor - he kept busting dance moves at the dinner table. When we finished eating we headed out to the dance and tore it up together. It was great to really connect with someone at a friendship visit again. 

The visit ended and we headed over to Cedar Point to meet with the parents of a Pi Alpha for dinner. They cooked us steak and potatoes and it was fantastic. We then headed into the park for a few hours. Unfortunately, we literally only had a few hours, so we only got to ride four rides. However, I crossed one roller coaster off of my bucket list - the Top Thrill Dragster. It only lasts 17 seconds, but it shoots you off at 120 mph and then 427' straight up in the air, then you plummet 427' almost straight down right afterwards.  It was awesome! 

Pictures won't do it justice, so here's a video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PuLRQHRzV8

Day 51: Holy Toledo

Course: Ann Arbor, MI to Toledo, OH
Distance: 50 miles
Terrain: Flat
Conditions: Sunny? Poor roads.

Today was the first day that we didn't start out with cold weather gear on. Prior to getting rain, I always thought that rain would be awesome. Now, I hate the rain. Rain + bike = angry Blake. Also, last day in Michigan means last day of terrible roads.

I rode with Derek and Kevin Dubbins, the man of steel. We averaged a pretty solid pace despite the 10-mile story Kevin told us about his crazy ex-stalker of a girl friend. Notice how "girl" and "friend" are separated - he'd prefer it that way. We got racked about 5 miles out from our stage-up location. It stunk to not be able to finish, but it was a big day and we had to be there on time. We gathered up and double pace lined down to our arrival in front of the University of Toledo. There were a lot of people there, including two TV stations and a lot of family and other supporters. We received a proclamation and a warm welcome from all kinds of people.

After the arrival and an amazing Chick-fil-A lunch, we headed over to the dorms for lodging. We cleaned up and then split into two groups. Since I'm a part of the puppet show group, we stuck together and went to a friendship visit to perform for young kids without disabilities. They're always really fun to perform for because they'll always try to ask questions at the end of the show to prove that the puppets aren't real in some way. In one of the plays, I play a blind man.

 One boy kept asking me situations like "What if your cat is loose in your backyard and you have to catch it, how do you do that?" Acting as the puppet, I answered, "Well I don't have a cat, but if I did I would have my mom chase it for me!" He wasn't pleased. "Well what if your mom is blind too?" "Then I would have my dad do it!"
"Well what if your dad is blind too and so are his parents?"
"Well, then I sure hope the cat comes back."

More kids would challenge us, but that only allowed for us to make funny answers. It was a great time as our last KOB performance of the year. That will always be one of my fondest memories of the trip.

After the puppet show we went to Outback Steakhouse for dinner. The KOB puppeteers sat together as a "last supper" kind of thing. At Outback, they bring you bread skewered on a knife as an appetizer/filler. The four of us were joking around with the waitress a lot, so we asked what the record was for loaves of bread eaten. She said that she had heard it was about 12, so we gladly accepted the challenge. Our rule was that no matter where we were in our meal, if she brought out a loaf, we had to stop and eat it. Eventually we had eaten so many that she started skewering two loaves per knife. At one point the waitress made us finish all of the food on our plates before she brought out more bread. Haven't heard that one since I was 5. We broke the record by eating 13 loaves (collectively - each loaf split into equal fourths). Our waitress literally asked us for our autographs, so she gave us a blank meal ticket and we all signed it. Total, I ate approximately 3.25 loaves of bread, a plate of salad, one giant baked potato, an 8 oz steak, and an 8 oz piece of chicken. Yet again, I was still hungry afterwards. Adjusting to college cafeteria dieting is going to be rough.

Dinner was so much fun, but the night only got better. Stomachs full, we headed over to get massages. Heaven. Amazing. Whatever else you want to call it - massages are awesome. When I'm a billionaire I'm getting one every day. Every kink in my legs was kneaded out and I felt like a new man when I walked out of that place. Afterwards the team went to fellow cyclist Saurabh Metah's house for ice cream and basketball. It was a lot of fun!

1) The KOB puppet crew

2) A bread toast....no pun intended

3) After the 13th loaf

4) Proof that Melissa, our waitress, wanted our autographs.

Day 50: Mock Rock

Course: East Lansing, MI to Ann Arbor, MI
Distance: 65 miles
Terrain: Mostly flat
Conditions: Overcast

Today, the ride went pretty smoothly. There wasn't too much in our way to slow us down. Construction was minimal, the winds were decently out of the way, and the roads weren't as terrible as they have been. I rode with Kyle Marpe and Chris "Steady" Stubel. We pretty much just played games for the whole ride to make the time pass. It rained on us again for about 10 miles, but it wasn't cold rain, so it wasn't so much of a problem.

We arrived to the Pi Kapp house at the University of Michigan. When we got there we got to split a box of pizza with one other person. Kyle Marpe and I split a box and I was still hungry after eating my half. Afterwards we rode to our dorms closer to campus where we would lodge for the night. The hall that we were in was very new. It was practically a hotel. We then headed out to our first friendship visit of the night with PEAC (Programs to Educate All Cyclists). It's a program that teaches kids with disabilities to ride bikes. We met with a few kids and got to ride bikes with them. One of the kids, Brad,  had Down Syndrome and had been with the program for over 10 years. He had gone from riding a trike to speeding around the parking lot faster than a lot of the JOH guys could. It was cool to see how a lot of the kids had developed. We got to see one boy begin to ride a two-wheeler on his own for the first time - very touching.

Afterwards we were shuttled over to our second friendship visit of the night. We met with the Eisenhower Center, which is a facility for people with disabilities. It was predominantly occupied by clients with brain damage. We ate a great dinner there and then participated in their Mock Rock show. Six groups of clients put on lip sync performances and in between their shows our guys would jump in. We did the Every Time We Touch dance that we always do at dances, and the four guys that know the Single Ladies dance did that as well. It's always hilarious to see them do that. It was a lot of fun to hang out with the clients and see them put on their performances. A lot of them got really into it.

Naturally, we all got hungry again, so we went to the Buffalo Wild Wings that was right across the street from our dorm hall. Everyone got their wing fix and then called it a night.

Day 49: ...It Pours

Course: Kalamazoo, MI to East Lansing, MI
Distance: 80 miles
Terrain: Mostly flat
Conditions: Rain, cold, poor roads

We left lodging having dusted off the cold weather gear and suited up for a chilly day. No one really knew that the cold wouldn't be our only enemy. 10 miles in it began to sprinkle. 11 miles in, torrential downpour began. At least it seemed that way due to our speed. We slowed down a bit to increase visibility, and it still poured. It got colder and colder and windier and windier. My own cold got worse as the rain came, and 30 minutes in I couldn't feel my hands anymore. I decided to rack up and get some rest because I was feeling so terribly.

I pretty much just slept until the end of the ride. When we got to lodging, our PM let me shower and get some rest before dinner. Just before dinner, he told me that I should stay at the hotel to sleep instead of going to dinner. I didn't mind, because really all I felt like doing was sleeping anyways. After I was woken up by two hot dogs that were to be my dinner, I felt pretty refreshed. Loads better, but still not that great. After I scarfed down the two hot dogs, Jeff, Jesus and I were craving Chipotle, so we went out to eat. I couldn't breathe through my nose so I didn't taste much, but I think I ate my burrito in less than three minutes.

I went back for the night and went to bed early. There really wasn't a lot going on this day for me since no riding took place and there wasn't a friendship visit.